Tag: men’s group

Muffin Robbery Causes Chaos at Men’s Group

Brett1 Comment

An incident occurred today at Men’s group which could have had catastrophic consequences. Feisty Fred the grumpy 95 yo resident had dozed off while painting one of the indoor golf boxes today. Fred had been unable to hold his paintbrush due to his self confessed condition of being “almost dead”, and proceeded to tell me he “couldn’t give a stuff!” then nodded off.

Nifty Neville the 70 year old resident (a former doctor) saw an opportunity to reach across and steal his muffin. I watched the theft take place and decided to keep the peace by not declaring that I saw him take it. Seconds later Fred woke up, looked at Neville (who was grinning like a cheshire cat) and noticed crumbs on his chin. Fred then let out an an almighty spray aimed at me. He said “Why don’t you go and punch this bastard in the the nose, he just stole my muffin!”. He then said “If you don’t belt him I will, I wanted that muffin!”.

I decided to leap into action and promised Fred I will source him a brand new ‘extra fresh’ muffin just for him. I ran to the kitchen but no-one was there, the morning tea trolley had left so I was forced to run to another wing of the aged care facility and beg for a muffin. Luckily they complied and I raced the muffin back to Fred.

Fred moved his new muffin to a safe place on the table before devouring it. He did zero painting today but I guess he was engaged in the group indirectly and a brawl was averted…..This is Dementia

Secret Men’s Business…Uncovered

Brett0 comment

Men’s Group brings me new challenges each week and I guess that is why I like it so much. I wanted to share another dynamic that comes with Men’s Group and that is ‘interacting new residents into a group’.

This week I had a new resident come and join us, his name is Harry and he is an absolute gentleman. He reminded me of my Dad in the way he dressed, and the way he communicated. I go and collect him from his room and introduce myself, and at this point I am rapidly assessing his capabilities. I shake hands with Harry and ask a few ‘safe’ but searching questions. I only have a few seconds to determine the following:

• Can he communicate ok?
• What is his level of cognition?
• Is he agitated or aggressive at all?
• Can he understand what I am saying to him?
• Does he have insight to where he is at with his dementia?
• Do I need to bring anything he might need or want? Eg a jacket or comfort item.

As I walked Harry over to the group we would talk casually about sports and his business life. Straight away he tells me is a member of a golf club. I then list off other sports and he said he used to play football. Instantly we have common ground and we are reminiscing. He is happy to be with me as the conversation is in ‘his world’.

I offer to play some indoor golf with him. He refuses and makes up an excuse. (This is common behaviour in a new group). I then set up the golf box and clubs and get Harry to help me carry the clubs. I set up balls on the ground and hand him a club, he once again refuses. I then realise that Harry recognises the game but is probably worried he will play it wrong or embarrass himself. I then arranged another resident to putt some balls in front of Harry so he can re-connect with the skills required.

I gently pass the club to Harry again and ask him “you sure you don’t want just one go?”. He refuses again politely and gives me an excuse. I then decide to start putting some balls into the golf box. Harry gets all excited when a ball goes in and he congratulates me. It happens again and he starts cheering and telling others. He is now engaged in the game. I then make an excuse to do something else and I ask Harry if he would mind holding the club while I attend to something else. (I have already laid out the balls on the floor). As I go to walk off I say to Harry “you may as well have a quick hit while you are there holding the club?”. He then putts and the ball goes in the hole. The group erupts and cheers. He putts again with same result. He is now on a ‘hat trick’ and once again he gets the ball in the hole. Everyone cheers , we make a huge fuss of Harry and feels part of the group.

As we were doing painting as well yesterday I tried to get Harry involved with this. Once again more refusals and excuses. We then agreed that he could just observe today so he politely agreed to sit at the table and chat with all of us. The conversations were fantastic and was a ‘huge win’ as even if the man does not do the activity we are interacting with each other and chatting about memories. The group also changes and becomes more interesting. I purposely placed paint and a brush in front of him should I get the chance to get him to try painting. I offered him the brush once again he refused. I have worked out that the key is to be side on to the men and act as casually as possible. My body language is always making the resident feel in charge and I am trying to be ‘one of the lads’. I then ask Harry if he could hold the box for me while I paint . He jumps at the chance to help me and does a great job of steadying the box. He compliments me on my painting skills and he has a smile on his face.

The message I wanted to share today was that in lifestyle activities it is possibly best not to give up when a resident rejects an activity. We need to delve into how they are feeling and determine why they are refusing. The key I have found is to be subtle and allow the resident to be in control. Almost tempt them into participating with strategically placed items and allow then to never fail. We need to set them up for success each and every time. Once again I am blown away with how people interact and engage. What an amazing classroom we have ?:)

Onya Lads…Great Community Spirit

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Was blown away today. I visited the Scout Recycling Centre at Hahndorf to see if I could obtain some old toasters, microwaves, ropes, stereos, and anything with screws, nuts or bolts on it for our ‘Gentlemen’s Club’ sessions.

David at the Scouts Recycling Centre rustled up a few items and is now kindly holding small appliances for our group when he comes across them….FREE!

A customer called John was listening in on our conversation and before I left he stopped me and offered his help as well by collecting and dropping off things he comes across on the job.

This is Xmas spirit people! It has also sparked an idea for me to recruit men to help other men in nursing homes and be their friends and mentors.

Hmmm….

Let’s see where this idea can go!

Thanks guys!…appreciated.

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The Gentlemen’s Club – Week 5

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We decided to change our name from ‘Men’s Group’ to ‘The Gentleman’s Club’ cos it was part of our banter this week and is probably a bit more dignified.

No photos this week as we did painting again, but we did have two new men join the group, and they loved it.

I wanted to share a story which involved my assistant, and once again I copped a BIG lesson.

We were planning the activity for next week and I suggested we make a ‘hardware style activity station’ for each man out of bolts and nuts etc. At the time I thought it was a good idea when he stopped me in my tracks.

He snapped at me and said “Brett …. No!!!…That activity is not gonna happen. I joined your group because you gave these men real purpose. Do not go backwards, only do things that mean something and are useful. We owe it to these men to give them purpose in life ”

Wow!… I was shocked with his passionate outburst, but rather than be offended that he hated my idea, I am going to embrace the feedback and involve ‘purpose ‘ in ALL my activities.

This life lesson brought to you by the Dementia Downunder Gentlemen’s Club. The most authentic & insightful classroom in the world!

Men’s Group Week 3 – 100% Engagement

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Great result yesterday with the Men’s Group painting 3x Golf boxes ( first coat). The idea is that we will make a box for every section of our nursing home. ( as golf is the no. 1 activity).

I hope to then donate more to other nursing homes in the Eldercare group then expand to others as well. This way we are doing something for others and is relevant and a valued outcome.A low cost activity which people at all stages of dementia can participate in some form. Was amazed when Bob even had a go at painting.

Feisty Fred (96) was having a whinge to me by saying “Why should I bloody paint anything at all when this was the reason my father was disappointed in me not working with him as a professional house painter?”

He said all this and much more (about life with his dad) across the session whilst his hands went to work and beautifully and speedily painted the bulk of the boxes (in his pajamas).

The other men painted parts of the box, the brand new dining table, the newspaper and themselves.🙂

Overall a great result as it started conversations, was productive, and everyone was engaged. Thanks to my new volunteer helper, Michael who did a great job with the men.

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Men’s Group – Week 2 Report

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Special Guest – “Elvis Partington!”

The ‘hands’ tell the story in this collection of pics. Plenty of tactile activities this week.We played indoor golf, vacuumed with dustbusters, drew stuff, tuned the radio, polished silver, sharpened pencils,ate freddo frogs and choc coated Scotch Fingers, messed with old items (telephone, ink stamps, adding machine, etc), and generally just hung out in the area we now call the ‘MEN’S DEN’.

A few things went wrong :

My 2 Dustbusters both ran out of charge.

The designer dust I brought in to vac up… went everywhere. ( I upset the cleaner!)

The textas I brought in for ‘free-hand drawing’ went dry.

One of the men dropped the entire contents of the electric pencil sharpener all over the carpet.

Another man emptied the DustBuster contents all over his cream pants.

A very wobbly resident nearly fell when he hooked the extension cord around his foot.

I had two men ‘walk off’, two men fall asleep.

Feisty Fred heckled me the entire session with ” I am so stuffed, I don’ t know what the hell you want me to do!”

He also said “Why don’t you do this stuff when I’m not half dead… I am so bloody tired!”

I actually ran out of activities even though I filled my van with double the amount I brought last week.

Besides all that it went pretty good:-)

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Mens’ Group Session #1 – Mixed Bag

Brett0 comment

 

I thought I would give a report on the first ‘men’s group’ session at the nursing home I have done for a while. I was really pleased with the participation and engagement of the 4 participants. We did so many different things that 3 out of the 4 men were asleep by the end of the 90 minutes as they were exhausted.

I brought a suitcase full of ‘conversation starters’ ( mixed items) which kept things moving and changing as we had our own blokey ‘show and tell’. It also allowed me to determine the interests and capabilities of each man for future sessions.

The tasks we tried were as follows:

old fashioned manual pencil sharpening
electric pencil sharpening
polishing tarnished silver items with brasso eg candle holder, tongs, ice bucket
indoor fishing from the ice bucket (complete with tangles and hooking items)

Smelling different incense sticks
Indoor bowling with tube/tennis ball (for men in princess chair)
Sorting wallplugs into holders
Swiss army knife ( we spent ages pulling out each feature of the knife – they loved this)
Multitool gadgets

I conducted a few races & challenges, with the men with good cognition/movement using manual pencil sharpeners racing against men with limitations using the electric pencil sharpener. I also did a timed event with ‘The General’ where he had to place 15 wallplugs into a plastic holder within 1 minute. He did this several times and counted aloud for every wallplug he inserted. The highlight was opening as many functions of the Swiss army knife as we could and discovering the secret items which were a pin, a pen, a toothpick and some tweezers.

The conversations were great as well and there were plenty of laughs and smiles. ‘The General’ was cracking jokes with me as we did the pencil sharpening task and would say things like “it’s great to see you getting to the point” and “you are very sharp today”.

Bob actually stayed awake for the entire 90 mins and smiled constantly.( he normally sleeps heavily through this time).

A great first session and what I learnt was that it was real handy to have a heap of activity options at my disposal to keep changing things up and holding the men’s interest.