Diary Blog – Page 8

Men’s Group – Week 2 Report

November 25, 2016November 28, 2016 Brett0 comment

Special Guest – “Elvis Partington!”

The ‘hands’ tell the story in this collection of pics. Plenty of tactile activities this week.We played indoor golf, vacuumed with dustbusters, drew stuff, tuned the radio, polished silver, sharpened pencils,ate freddo frogs and choc coated Scotch Fingers, messed with old items (telephone, ink stamps, adding machine, etc), and generally just hung out in the area we now call the ‘MEN’S DEN’.

A few things went wrong :

My 2 Dustbusters both ran out of charge.

The designer dust I brought in to vac up… went everywhere. ( I upset the cleaner!)

The textas I brought in for ‘free-hand drawing’ went dry.

One of the men dropped the entire contents of the electric pencil sharpener all over the carpet.

Another man emptied the DustBuster contents all over his cream pants.

A very wobbly resident nearly fell when he hooked the extension cord around his foot.

I had two men ‘walk off’, two men fall asleep.

Feisty Fred heckled me the entire session with ” I am so stuffed, I don’ t know what the hell you want me to do!”

He also said “Why don’t you do this stuff when I’m not half dead… I am so bloody tired!”

I actually ran out of activities even though I filled my van with double the amount I brought last week.

Besides all that it went pretty good:-)

Mens’ Group Session #1 – Mixed Bag

November 19, 2016November 24, 2016 Brett0 comment

I thought I would give a report on the first ‘men’s group’ session at the nursing home I have done for a while. I was really pleased with the participation and engagement of the 4 participants. We did so many different things that 3 out of the 4 men were asleep by the end of the 90 minutes as they were exhausted.

I brought a suitcase full of ‘conversation starters’ ( mixed items) which kept things moving and changing as we had our own blokey ‘show and tell’. It also allowed me to determine the interests and capabilities of each man for future sessions.

The tasks we tried were as follows:

old fashioned manual pencil sharpening
electric pencil sharpening
polishing tarnished silver items with brasso eg candle holder, tongs, ice bucket
indoor fishing from the ice bucket (complete with tangles and hooking items)

Smelling different incense sticks
Indoor bowling with tube/tennis ball (for men in princess chair)
Sorting wallplugs into holders
Swiss army knife ( we spent ages pulling out each feature of the knife – they loved this)
Multitool gadgets

I conducted a few races & challenges, with the men with good cognition/movement using manual pencil sharpeners racing against men with limitations using the electric pencil sharpener. I also did a timed event with ‘The General’ where he had to place 15 wallplugs into a plastic holder within 1 minute. He did this several times and counted aloud for every wallplug he inserted. The highlight was opening as many functions of the Swiss army knife as we could and discovering the secret items which were a pin, a pen, a toothpick and some tweezers.

The conversations were great as well and there were plenty of laughs and smiles. ‘The General’ was cracking jokes with me as we did the pencil sharpening task and would say things like “it’s great to see you getting to the point” and “you are very sharp today”.

Bob actually stayed awake for the entire 90 mins and smiled constantly.( he normally sleeps heavily through this time).

A great first session and what I learnt was that it was real handy to have a heap of activity options at my disposal to keep changing things up and holding the men’s interest.

Lifestyle is a Cabaret

November 9, 2016November 9, 2016 Brett0 comment

Ever thought about changing the uniform of the Lifestyle Carer to one similar to what Liza Minnelli is wearing?

I have witnessed hundreds of lifestyle sessions at the nursing home at close range and I believe I have discovered the ‘secret’ to this role. To make the leap from being a good lifestyle carer to a great one it is not just about rolling out an endless range of activities and games it is primarily about the personality of that person. In my opinion they need to be ‘entertainer’ first and foremost, a brilliant conversationalist, super positive, intuitive and switched on to the room dynamics. I have seen many different carers perform the same activities and the impact they have on the residents.

I am in awe of the No.1 carer (who I will call ‘Liza’) who turns up each morning and within seconds transforms the energy & vibe of the communal room from morbid and boring to a vaudeville cabaret. I have to admit that at first I was taken aback by her ‘out there’ style when we first placed Dad in the nursing home. I thought she was potentially a loose cannon and so outrageous that she was in the wrong job and could be a risk to residents. How wrong was I?….

Liza is not only vivacious and can almost talk under water, she has the ability to detect any resident who is not engaged and finds a way to involve them or look after them if they are not having a good day. It is what she says and does that is important, and is not actually about the activity. The activity is merely a prop to start conversations and entertain. Liza makes handing out tea and biscuits fun as she talks about her failed cooking experiences and jumps on any reaction from a resident to explore another avenue of dialogue.

To give you an example – this week she encountered a ‘male’ resident with his arm stuck in his cardigan and he was all twisted up with only his elbow popping through the opening of the sleeve. Most of us would say “oh Mr Johnson, what have you done? Let me fix that up for you”.

This is how Liza handled the situation:

She ran up to the resident and yelled out (for everyone to here) “Oh ‘Mrs Jonhson’ your baby is crowning!!!….keep pushing …keep pushing…we need to get your baby out before morning tea arrives”. Everyone was laughing and enjoying the moment and whilst not everyone understood the joke, they ‘felt’ the fun and frivolity and laughed along as Liza adjusted the resident who felt really special because he was the centre of attention.

What worries me is that Liza could possibly be viewed by family members as not providing care in the way us family members are conditioned to imagine it. Quiet, controlled and calm. I can see someone complaining to Management about Liza if they walked in and watched her in mid flight. This would be a tragedy and the residents would dearly miss her if she was ever transferred based on a misguided complaint.

My message??…. Lifestyle is about engagement and entertainment and when we judge the performance of the lifestyle carer we should be looking at the faces of the residents for the answers.

Bravo Liza!

My Magical Mystery Tour

November 7, 2016November 9, 2016 Brett0 comment

In typical Partington style today I am keeping things ‘different’ and sharing a side of me that has not yet been discussed , but surprise, surprise is still dementia related:). I felt it was important for people to understand how my dementia advocacy came about and how my attitude towards providing positive dementia care was formed. It is a bizarre story, but the last 12 months have been insightful, inspirational and full of magical moments. This story is essentially a story of gratitude and respect for my mentor and good friend Dr Faizal Ibrahim.

For those of you who know Faizal will understand what I mean when I say this man is unpredictable and outrageously funny. But he also commands your attention when in his presence, and no-one owns a room like Faizal does. He is also one of the most compassionate people I have ever met with a massive heart who runs on adrenaline and a never ending supply of passion, energy and drive. How I met Faizal is a story in itself and testament of how by doing something in the ‘heat of the moment’ you can change your destiny and your attitude towards life.

It was just over a year ago I was sitting by myself in the middle of the Glenelg football Clubrooms listening & learning from speakers presenting at the Alzheimer’s Australia Dementia Awareness Forum. I had previously had over a year or so of really difficult moments with Dad’s behaviours in the hospital and at home and I was basically ‘cooked’, but did not realise it until this day. It was the first time I had actually switched off my ‘caring for Dad’ mode and actually went into study & self reflection mode. As I sat there hearing personal dementia stories of others I realised I was not alone and was inspired by the speakers and in particular the Glover family from Port Lincoln. I was drawn to their story and loved the way their family rallied around Robin (the husband/father) who has dementia. They were in the early stages of their journey but had so many similarities to how they approached dementia. I spoke with wife Valda and daughter Deborah in the break and compared notes and thanked them for sharing their story.

Just after lunch it was announced that the keynote speaker Professor Richard Fleming from Tasmania was not able to attend the event and had been replaced by Faizal who was given only a few hours notice to ‘save the day’. To say that Faizal made an impact on the room was an understatement. He might only be small in stature, but he is larger than life and totally engaged the audience within seconds in his trademark mustard suit and his favourite story about Kentucky Fried Chicken. What stood out for me was he was the first doctor I had ever heard talk about ‘dignity’ for people in care and as he is a Geriatrician and specializes in people with dementia he certainly had my attention. I had personally experienced some very confronting and mind blowing events in hospital with dad at this point and here was Faizal saying “enough is enough….we need to look after ALL people in hospitals and treat them with dignity and respect’. It was so refreshing to hear this from a doctor and all of a sudden I started bawling like a baby. I cried for the next 45 minutes uncontrollably as I realized where I was at in our journey and what we had already encountered. I was so impressed that a medical professional was looking after people in such a caring and unique manner and prepared to make a stand, and was calling for dementia champions.

After Faizal finished his presentation I decided I am not leaving this room until I meet him and give him my business card. He was in a real hurry to get back to patients, but I managed to slip him my card and tell him…”if you need help, I am your man!” .This moment sparked a 12 month frenzy of dementia advocacy that has changed my life. Faizal said he would contact me tomorrow as he had a mission for me. He did this and convinced me to write an article for the Hospital Research Foundation to help them raise money by telling our family story (check it out here –https://www.hospitalresearch.com.au/the-long-goodbye-brett…/ ). Faizal became my mentor and has introduced me to so many influential people within the hospital network and aged care system and opened many doors.

I have watched him do his thing and have learnt so much about dementia care, how to look after people with dignity, and how to create culture change. He has taught me how to influence people, given me the confidence to speak in public and inspired me to make a difference on a big scale without fear. Whenever Faizal has been involved ‘magic happens’ – he is on 11 committees, he is a very well respected geriatrician and dementia advocate, and he cares like no other. He encouraged me to study and complete the UTAS MOOC online course and has spent so much time steering me along the right paths to allow me to create as much culture change and awareness as I can. We have been so busy working together on all our dementia related activities and I pinch myself when I am in the hospital committee meetings sitting amongst such knowledgeable medical people in a world I never thought I would understand. Even though I have no medical credentials Faizal interpreted the jargon for me and made me feel an integral part of the team as the consumer rep.

I would like to take this opportunity to sincerely thank him for taking me under his wing and creating such an amazing array of experiences, valuable learning and self discovery for me. Faizal is currently dealing with his sick father in Malaysia and my thoughts are with his family.

Faizal came up to me recently and reflected upon our first year advocating & presenting together…he then said ” we did well, but now things are going to get busy for you” …..ahhhhhhhhh!!!!

Thank you Faizal for your mentorship, friendship & care for our family. Bravo!

The Rollercoaster Ride Never Stops…

November 6, 2016November 9, 2016 Brett0 comment

I thought I would share another little chapter in our journey which I am hoping some of you may learn from, and many others probably understand or have seen this situation. Dad was having a very average day yesterday and when I turned up the carers told me that he was unresponsive and vague. He was also leaning to the right hand side again and his mouth was hanging loose. Straight away I thought he must of had a TIA (mini stroke). His obs were perfect and he was well checked over and we just let things ride.

Today I went into the nursing home and Dad lit up when he saw me (as per usual), held my hand for a while and spoke a few mumbled words. I was relieved as I thought there was improvement on previous day. Two minutes later I watched his eyes change colour, they rolled back and went all sorts of directions and he went pale. He was having a TIA right in front of me! The nurse was really good and fetched an oxygen cylinder and we left the mask on him for 20 minutes and he slowly started to smile again. Phew!….

I re-visited him in the afternoon and his emotions were shot and he was erratically crying, he had twitching in his arms and he was dehydrated. I gave him a few glasses of water as he sat and watched Andre Rieu on tv for the millionth time:)

I noticed he had a dry mouth and his lips were a bit stuck together. It is these ‘small signs’ that we need to look out for as family members as they possibly could be missed by our very good time-stretched carers. Imagine having your very dry lips stuck together and a dry mouth for hours with no-one noticing? It must be irritating and uncomfortable. I drove to the chemist and bought some ‘paw paw’ cream and placed it on his lips – giving him instant relief.

Dad is ok but now really vague and his mind scrambled as he recovers (last time it took 3-4 days).He is trying to smile and tap his fingers to the music without much success. It is these times that our family goes into overdrive and we step up the caring and monitoring as his capabilities are temporarily impaired. My Mum has been doing a sterling job going in every night for the last few months to ensure he is clean and dry before he falls asleep and has the most comfortable sleep he can have. Onya Mum!

Hopefully some good lessons & learnings for all in this story.

Thanks

‘Dementia Downunder’ – Youtube Channel

November 2, 2016November 2, 2016 Brett0 comment

I just wanted to remind you all about the Dementia Downunder Youtube Channel. I will be creating a series of short videos over the next few months that will allow me to share my tips about positive dementia care. The future videos will all be 3 minutes or less in duration and will cover my Top 10 positive dementia care tips.

I have created two videos so far with one released today which is an excerpt from my very first presentation as a dementia advocate (Dementia Friendly Communities). It demonstrates some of the lifestyle activities I am involved with at the nursing home plus a few funny stories. This short video was taken 8/9/2015 but certainly covers my thoughts on dementia friendly communities.

Please subscribe to the channel by clicking the ‘SUBSCRIBE’ button.

To view the two videos click below:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkk3w2JPGuEXdcmDApabVsg

Dementia Friendly Community – Barossa Valley

October 31, 2016 Brett0 comment

‘THE SENIOR’ NEWS – NOVEMBER ARTICLE

Everyone’s Favourite ‘Online Dad’ – Bob Partington is in print on page 9 of The Senior News beaming out his trademark smile.

This photo was taken a while ago when he was mobile.Collecting leaves was something he enjoyed doing as it was a meaningful activity that kept the outside areas of the nursing home tidy.

To view the entire publication click : http://www.thesenior.com.au/digital-paper/sa-digital-papers/

Lifting Me Higher & Higher

October 28, 2016October 31, 2016 Brett0 comment

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The patient lifter….. This has completely changed the game for us.

To be perfectly honest I had no idea there was such a contraption and over the years I heard the carers talking about these machines, but I never saw them used. Dad’s latest decline has happened fairly quickly and we have gone from standing and shuffling everywhere to being lifted and wheeled everywhere (within a month or so).

Bob no longer can stand up, walk or bear his own weight so now needs to be transported in a harness via a hydraulic lifting machine into a chair, bed or anywhere else for that matter. When you see your loved one suspended in the air inside a harness, (a bit like a baby in a stork’s mouth) you start to question where they are at. Not much has shocked me over the journey but I did find this procedure confronting the first few times. I must admit it went through my head, “what kind of existence is this?”. Dad now needs two carers to deal with him and us family members feel a bit helpless as we can no longer play the lead caring role. This physical disengagement can be hard to deal with when you have been so ‘hands on’ for such a long time.

I tend to now go back to spending the ‘quality time’ with dad (as a son visiting) and actually let the carers do their work. Before dad can be lifted anywhere he has to be rolled over a few times to allow the harness to be attached. They use a fabric sheet called a ‘Slippery Sam’ (that’s what they call it at our nursing home) and they place this under the resident. This allows the carers to roll the person from side to side to allow the harness to be fitted. The carers tend to have discussions about which colour straps to hook on the lifting machine as I gather the person’s height and weight may have something to do with this decision? Once the colour is selected they hook the harness on and the lifting begins. I am told the harness straps need to be carefully placed for the men. (if you know what I mean…)

Mum or I may help the carers by re-assuring dad with some calming words and firm hand holding. When they first lift him up the feeling for dad is one of fear and terror as the harness takes up his weight and suddenly elevates him mid-air. He is moved around the room like a crane and is dangled quite high above the bed which makes you a bit nervous. He is then placed in a shower chair and wheeled into the bathroom or placed into a princess chair where he now spends his day.

This new part of the journey has been difficult for our family as we have to hand back the prime responsibility of caring to the paid carers. The carers do an amazing job and it is really hard work in trying conditions. Amazingly dad has been really happy once placed in his princess chair (or is it an ML chair?). Once he is ready for the day he usually has a snooze straight after due to exhaustion as the showering procedure is really labour intensive. It is amazing how humans adapt to new conditions and dad is no exception.

When I turn up to the nursing home now I find him perched up in his chair in the main communal room laughing at other residents. He is relaxed and still produces that trademark smile that keeps our spirits up. We continue to banter and laugh in our very own version of ‘Nursing Home Seinfeld’…..a show about ‘NOTHING’.

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City of Playford – Dementia Forum

October 17, 2016October 24, 2016 Brett0 comment

The City of Playford Dementia Forum was held at the Grenville Hub.

Presenters were Brett Partington, Rob Crouch and Lynn Field.

A very engaged crowd of more than 70 consumers and caregivers were in attendance. Thank you to Leah Norris – Dean and Caroline Brandon for hosting and organising the event.

The event was also the launch for Syd’s corner in the Library. Syd was a popular local who passed away from dementia.

PS – Thanks for having me back again to speak and also for the delicious gift!

‘Random Act of Manliness’ – Robbie’s Chop Shop

October 11, 2016October 11, 2016 Brett0 comment

Who would have thought a haircut could bring a man so much pleasure? If you haven’t heard of Robbie’s Chop Shop in Adelaide you ain’t in the ‘cool crowd’. Robbie Ferrante is the charismatic owner of a unique ‘males only’ barber shop at Hyde Park who yesterday did something that just placed him in the ‘legend category’.

But first, I need to give you the vibe on Robbie’s business – it has a 50’s style barber shop feel with a chequered floor, and attracts a crowd that is either buffed, super smooth or a combination of both, ranging in age from 18-50. While us shaggy dudes are waiting to be shorn we take in some loud ‘grunty’ beats, have a beer, chill out and chat….oh, and get a great haircut. The ‘chop’ is almost secondary to the unique experience where every guy is greeted as though they are a member of the gang and been a life-long friend. The vision for the shop is that it is the last male frontier and is a unique form of man sanctuary.

They don’t take bookings, you have to line up ‘soup nazi’ style (Seinfeld) along a wall and wait your turn to jump on the next available barber throne. The difference with this establishment is that the customers have to work out who is next in line and we all nervously jostle along the wooden bench to make sure we don’t jump the queue or worse still, miss our spot. As one of the cutters becomes available he yells out really loudly ….”WHO’S UP NEXT BOYS?”. At this point you jump at the chair with all the machismo you can muster to let the other customers know that you were next in line, and there is no question about it.

There is plenty of testosterone-fuelled bravado as the customers pour into the shop and greet Robbie, who commandeers chair #1 near the front door. He offers you a signature ‘elbow handshake’ (as he has scissors and a comb in his hands) and if you are from his home country or wearing a white singlet and gold chain you may get a ‘man-kiss’ on the cheek. If you are an old guy like me you get a handshake and a “How’s it goin’ man?”. You get swept up in the macho atmosphere and instantly feel like getting an arm full of tattoos, a nose piercing or maybe for those less adventurous…buying a ‘chop shop’ cap.

So what did Robbie do that was so special? Well last week Mum decided Bob needed a proper man’s haircut and was on a mission to find a ‘barber style’ guy for the job. So she high tailed it up King William Road and stormed into the ‘Chop Shop’. She was pretty headstrong this day and did not see the “Men Only” sign in the window, or the shop full of guys lined up against the wall. With the eyes of the entire place on her in disbelief, Mum went up to Robbie and told her story about her husband with dementia in the nursing home who couldn’t get a decent haircut. I can just imagine the awkward scene as she rattled off her concerns and asked if someone could visit the nursing home and cut dad’s hair? Robbie then made a split second decision and said “no worries, I’ll do it”(probably to get her out of the shop quickly).

With dementia, you never know how the person will wake up, and how long it will take to shower, dress and prepare them for an appointment. Luckily we were having a ‘good day’ and Bob was in a good mood and comfortable. Robbie instantly bonded with Bob and chatted with him like every other customer, even though the mumbled responses came back in ‘dementia-nese’. Bob nodded off to sleep as he was given his haircut in his room and seemed to really enjoy the hypnotizing buzz of the clippers. When the haircut was done Robbie went up to Mum and said “This one’s on me…no charge!”.

That goodwill gesture earnt him a big hug from Mum plus he has just recruited 4 new customers (Bob, My boys and I) and credibility as one of Adelaide’s Good Guys!

Bravo Robbie!